Voice 3 – Voice Week 2014

That damn girl, always makin me late. Just like her momma come afore her, can’t get her own two damn feet outta of her own way.

A bust lip come between me and my pay last week. Today its her bag. Don’t need no school phonin me again. So I jump in a taxi ta meet her bus. Crazy I am.

Still in all, the world be a lonelier place without her. Just like her momma come afore her, shes all kind and gentle like. Wouldn’t harm a thing.

Wish Niko weren’t with her. That boy is shady as a tree.

“What the? Noooooo. Oh dear, no. Maria?”

This is my third post for voice week. The object of voice week is to tell the same story each day in 100 words from the perspective of five different characters all having a different voice. If you want to participate or read any of the other participants work you can head over to voice week head quarters and find out more there.

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About Billie Jo Schinnerer

Born and raised on the edge of the Helderberg Escarpment in eastern New York. Formerly a primary and middle school teacher. Moved to the North West area of England in 2003. Now a mother of three and a wannabe author.
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10 Responses to Voice 3 – Voice Week 2014

  1. Pingback: Voice 3 – Voice Week 2014 | Into the Sun | Voice Week HQ

  2. Hmm, must be her father. A poor, simple man, rough around the edges but works hard and loves his family. With the mother evidently dead, and judging from his reaction, I wonder if she fainted because of the same sickness?

  3. elmowrites says:

    Ooh, I’m still waiting to see how all this trns out, but story aside, this is a great voice. You’ve got a real way with words, and yet each one is distinct from the others. Good stuff

  4. Carrie says:

    A uneducated individual, male, probably the father. Frustrated but he still loves her and would protect her if he could.

  5. Oh — oopsy! For some reason, I thought this voice was the mother (where “just like her momma” was simply a way of saying “just like me”), but reading the other commenters, I’m thinking I was mistaken. My bad!

    But I digress, I love the unique tone and styling here, which provides nice contrast for the voice. “That boy is shady as a tree” was a beautiful simile, which seemed to fit in with this voice perfectly.

  6. Again with the cliffhanger ending! Those are killing me in the best way. I love this voice, how real it is. And the repetition of the “like her momma come afore her” gives a hint at their relationships. Loving it so far.

  7. yikici says:

    Great voice Billie Jo, poor man, sounds like he’s doing the best for his daughter, but is also struggling to keep food on the table. He pulls the reader straight in, great job. 🙂

  8. Parul says:

    Wow, what a different voice this was! This seems to be the father. Good-hearted albeit not good humored, hard working man. There is so much you conveyed about him in this little self-reverie of his. I really enjoyed this.

  9. Excellent voice! You portrayed his personality very well; I think I got a good feel for him despite the brevity. And again I am very curious about what happened here. 😀

  10. jenniesisler says:

    A father who’s rough around the edges and at his wit’s end trying to take care of his daughter, but one who really cares. So far this is my favorite character.

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